Her Rainbow Fruitcake

NOTE: On my comp, the other language was in wingding and it didn't do it here!! Sorry for typos D:


Now there happened to be one young soul, whose character was undoubtedly altruistic. She completed an immeasurable amount of chivalrous deeds, such as slowing her car down in front of a badly timed bunny rabbit hopping across the street, or flipping over a struggling beetle from its deathly backside. Whatever it was, her indomitable, unfeigned love and clemency for the living creatures of this Earth could not be thwarted. The question that lies unanswered is this: what about the creatures of … perhaps another planet?
This story is her accounted dealings with aliens of Mars. Please keep in mind the amount of time it took to translate their language.
The Martian spread his fingers uncomfortably apart, “Greetings, Baroon. What brings you to this lab?” His throw-up green colored eyes stared upon a lab-tested leaf. Below was the word location (which actually looked like this: location) with a big green blue sphere residing beside it.
Baroon, the purple faced Martian, flexed his lips. “It appears that our infallible and unerring nature, is not so facile, as we believed it to be. We cannot obtain a miniscule amount of information on the substance engulfed by human creatures.” Red Faced Throw-up Green, or as said in their language RedFacedThrowupGreen, assented with his results; for not only did he never have a discrepancy with Baroon, but he too could not trace this ‘food’ to which humans love. All they had to engulf was Red Polbus, a delicacy upon the red sand of Mars. “We must embark upon our spaceship to Earth, so that we may try this ‘food’ as well. But their “air” is more than just pungent. It is completely virulent! Beware; keep your mask upon your face and do not remove it.”
And that was that.
Meanwhile on planet Earth, the charitable young woman, whom you know well, reposed upon her couch, dreaming of the new luxurious phone pole that was soon to be put up. Finally those poor pigeons could rest upon the telephone line. Ding dong!
“Coming!” She ran to her door. In walked Baroon and RedFacedThrowupGreen, awkwardly plodding upon the carpet floor with their new ugg boots. “Hello, Charitable Creature. We come from a dearth of Red Polbus inhabited land. May we try some of your delectable ‘food’?”
Charitable Creature stood, frozen over with shock. What was to be her reply? She had heard of Mars’ truculent history of brutal treatment from brother to brother. And shall we forget the latest article of Mars’ attack upon the tree of Prince Edward’s Island? They had taken a leaf with them! But as Charitable Creature began thinking, she came to the conclusion of helping them. Her actions would never become remiss with laziness and neither would it be for Martians. She would become a great benefactor to helping Earth become allies with Mars. Breaking out of her usually diffident behavior, Charitable Creature outburst with temerity. “YES! I shall make you… RAINBOW FRUITCAKE!”

The happy Martians returned home with new faces. Baroon, the old purple-faced Martian was now a rainbow faced Martian, as well as the old red-faced, throw-up green eyed Martian. His name in Martian now looked like this:
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THE END